Thinking....

I hope everyone is finishing up their shopping and wrapping.  One day I will finish.  I am determined to have it all together this year and not be running around on Christmas Eve trying to finish.

Around the holidays, there is one constant thing that I tend to think about.  I do not talk about it much for not many understand or even want to hear about it.  I think about it very privately for fear that I may shed tears or question why things are the way they are.  I think about our son Maddux who is in heaven celebrating Christmas with Jesus himself.  It brings joy in my life to know that he is running around with other children and laughing and swinging.  Sometimes I wonder what life would have been like if he were still with us.  But I know God had other plans.  It is so hard to believe that Maddux would be almost 6.  I always wonder who he would have looked like.  What he would have wanted for Christmas this year.  But I know he is getting the best gift of all...to be with Jesus and to be able to sit on his lap and listen to his stories.  

In reading another blog, I found this great verse.  

Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles, and let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us. Let us fix our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy set before him endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God. Consider him who endured such opposition from sinful men, so that you will not grow weary and lose heart."

Hebrews 12:1-3

It reminds me of last year's Vacation Bible School and the theme of running the race for God.  I feel like sometimes God is pulling us to continue on in the race, but we keep calling out "I am too tired" or "Let me just rest for a minute".  My prayer for 2009 is that I will continue on and not get weary.  God has great plans for us and all he ask me to do is TRUST.  Easy enough, right??